Monday, April 10, 2006


What have I become?
My Sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
Trent Reznor
Guess 'ole Trent head the nail on the head with this one. Seems all my life I've been trying to find someone that would make me happy with myself. Unbeknownst to me that person does not exist. I've hurt people along the way....Allowed them to fall in love with me and then do things that hurt them. All because I was terribly unhappy with who I was. It's taken me thirty eight years to realize this. But I have done so.
I feel like i'm finally getting my life on track. I'm in a job that I love, my relationship with my son is stronger now than it ever was, And romantically i'm taking it as it comes. Not pushing too much and just letting fate hand me what it wants. Sometimes when you realize that your not in control and let God, Fate, or whatever you call it take over it really comes much easier.
I guess that if anyone reading this is someone that I've hurt in some way please take this as my apology. I know i've done wrong by you and I'm truly sorry. May your days be long and your nights pleasant.
Hit that 'lil envelope there and drop me a line. Say HI or whatever.